Explaining Therapy/Counselling to Older Children and Teenagers

• Set aside a quiet time to have the discussion.

• Briefly, in a couple of sentences, talk about the challenges that your family has been having. Stick with the facts including what you’ve tried to do so far and how it’s worked out.

• Let them know that you have decided to ask for more help and that you’ve made an appointment for counselling. Tell them when it is, the counselor’s name and what they’ll do there (i.e. do an activity to help them to get to know the counselor and have an opportunity to ask questions about the process). Ask if they have any questions, thoughts or feelings about the appointment.

• Explore their beliefs about what counselling is and who goes to counselling. Many kids come with two worries, one that they are in trouble or two that they are “crazy”.

  Most teens initial exposure to what counseling is comes from two places; the media and the school guidance counselor. The kids they see going to the counselor “are crazy or in trouble”. They have no other frame of reference for why they are being “sent” to counseling (like being “sent” to their room.)

  A gentler message is to explain that there are all types of counselors. This one is different and here’s why:

  “Yes, some kids do go to counselors because they are in trouble or crazy, but Irena is not that kind of counselor. She helps kids and parents learn to calm anxieties. She will listen to you and teach you new things to try. So, you are not crazy or in trouble. We’re just going to get some extra help to figure this out.”